Every kid loves a snow day. A spontaneous, free day off school is nothing short of magic. Bonus snow days are a good reminder that no matter how great we think school is, nothing beats a day off. Most children don’t hate going to school. They don’t love it. But they don’t despise it. It’s like a job. It’s probably safe to say that most children’s attitude towards school is mixed. At the end of the day, they get to see their friends, and play at lunch, and maybe even learn something interesting, but they still grumble about getting out of bed and on their way. So for the average kid, school’s not bad. However, for children with autism, school often holds a less favourable view, and it’s harder to get them there. School refusal is a fairly common challenge among children with autism, often stemming from anxiety, social difficulties, sensory sensitivities, and unwanted changes in routine. Addressing these barriers requires a personalized and supportive approach that considers your child’s unique needs. 

Here are ten strategies to help reduce school refusal and promote ways to encourage a positive school experience amongst children with autism in Toronto.

1. Identify Triggers

Sit down and have a conversation with your child about why they don’t want to go to school. Is there an issue with a bully? Does it have something to do with the class material? Understanding why your child is refusing school is the first step in finding a solution. Some common triggers may include sensory sensitivities (e.g., loud noises, bright lights), social challenges, academic difficulties, or anxiety about transitions. Take notes about how your child is acting and some of the things that they are saying. Find patterns in their behaviour. Then, discuss your concerns with their teachers. They can also help identify and address some triggers and might hold more clues to what is happening. 

2. Create A Predictable Routine

If you make the daily trip to school—and the events surrounding the journey—fun and consistent, you will have a more willing participant. Many children with autism thrive on routine. Work with your child to establish a consistent morning and school-day schedule to help reduce their anxiety and give them a sense of familiarity. Once they have a certain ritual that they follow, they’ll fall into a groove that will make getting up and venturing through the snow to school less painful. Don’t shy away from using a few props to help you along. Visual schedules, timers, and social stories can prepare the child for what to expect each day, making transitions smoother and less stressful.

3. Use Gradual Exposure Techniques

Sometimes it’s hardest to get back into the groove of going to school after a long break, like the Winter Holidays, or following an extra long weekend. Don’t feel like you need to rush things. If your child is experiencing severe school refusal, a gradual reintroduction can be helpful. Start with short visits to the school, such as meeting a teacher outside of school hours, and slowly increase the time spent in the school environment. This method helps build comfort and confidence.

4. Address Sensory Challenges

The overhead fluorescent lights can be particularly jarring. The noise from the hallway can be distracting. Not to mention the school bell itself, which can be ear-splitting to some kids. Many children with autism struggle with sensory overload at school. This could be a part of the reason why they are reluctant to go back each day. Try to make it a little easier for them by providing sensory supports such as sunglasses, weighted blankets, noise-canceling headphones, fidget tools, or access to a quiet space. These helpful devices can help regulate sensory input and make school more manageable. Talk to your child’s instructors and principal about how you can make things more comfortable for them. Most schools are willing to implement sensory-friendly accommodations where necessary.

5. Incorporate Special Interests

Does your child love comic books and super heroes? Are they drawn to stuffed animal toys? Do they know everything there is to know about dinosaurs? Celebrate their unique fascinations and do what you can to incorporate their passions into their daily school regime. By integrating your child’s special interests into school activities can increase engagement and motivation. When building your child’s IEP, talk to the teachers about how they can use preferred topics in assignments or provide rewards related to the child’s interests. This strategy makes learning more enjoyable and reduces school-related anxiety.

6. Strengthen Home-School Communication

It really does take a village to get a child with autism to school and back. At Monarch House, we embrace this collaborative approach. A strong partnership between parents and educators is crucial. Get the email addresses and phone numbers of your child’s teachers and educational assistants. Don’t be a stranger. Be constantly involved (without being a pest). Regular communication ensures that concerns are addressed promptly and that strategies remain effective. Daily check-ins, email updates, or a communication notebook can help parents and teachers stay aligned.

7. Provide Emotional Support

Your child may be dragging their feet on the way to school, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they hate it. There are other feelings that could be mixed in there, and the only way to get to the bottom of them is to communicate clearly with your child with empathy. Children with autism may struggle to express their emotions. If you feel the source of this apprehension is anxiety, teaching self-regulation techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, or using visual emotion charts can help them manage stress. Talk to the other parents. An additional trusted adult at school (such as a principal, counsellor or teacher) can provide support when your child is feeling overwhelmed.

8. Develop An Individualized Education Plan (IEP)

Every child with autism is different, and your child is no exception. They need a customized, personalized, plan that is tailored to their educational requirements and no one else’s. At Monarch House, we can help you with the building blocks of what to include in an IEP. This individualized education plan outlines specific accommodations tailored to your child’s needs, such as extra transition time, modified assignments, or breaks in a quiet area. These accommodations help create a more supportive learning environment and reduce stressors that contribute to school refusal.

9. Encourage Peer Support And Social Skills Development

It’s not always easy for children with autism to make and keep new friends. This barrier can make school less enjoyable for them. It’s not uncommon for social difficulties to contribute to school refusal. As a parent or caregiver, there are a few steps you can take. You can encourage peer support, buddy systems, or social skills groups at school and during extra curricular programs. This can help your child develop friendships and feel more comfortable in the school environment. Structured activities like lunchtime clubs or small group interactions can also be beneficial.

10. Use Positive Reinforcement

A hug, a high five, a sticker, a little game time, or a simple word of praise can go a long way towards motivating your child to keep going when things are looking a little bleak. Celebrating small successes with praise, rewards, or preferred activities can encourage school attendance. Reinforcing positive behaviours rather than focusing on avoidance helps build confidence and motivation. Even small steps, such as getting ready on time or attending for part of the day, should be recognized.

Your child is probably never going to jump up and down about catching the school bus to start their day in the morning. However, it’s important that there’s not a looming sense of dread about starting the school day either. At Monarch House, we can work with you and your child to make it a little less arduous and a little more fun. Reducing school refusal in children with autism requires a collaborative and individualized approach. By working together with parents, caregivers, educators, and educational assistants, we can set out to identify triggers, create new, agreeable, structured routines, and provide  appropriate accommodations that will make the day more comfortable. With a little creativity and team spirit it’s possible to make school more fun and friendly for children with autism in Toronto. Don’t feel like this is something that you need to tackle on your own. At Monarch House we have a professional, interdisciplinary staff of occupational therapists, behavioural therapists, psychotherapists, and speech pathologists that are here to help. With the right strategies, school can become a place of learning, growth, and success for every child.